Coming Out Atheist Message

I'm toying with the idea of a short & sweet coming out message to my friends, many of whom went to Christian youth group with me. This would probably come as a minor "huh" moment for most of them.
I'm not sure how serious I am about posting this on Facebook. Probably not very, because I'm not really the type to make a big stink about my beliefs. I thought this might be helpful as a Coming Out Atheist letter for others. Here's a draft:

About 20 years ago, I started sincerely exploring the reasons why I believed in God. True things withstand scrutiny, and it was important to me that I be consistent in the things I accept as true. I considered the strength of the foundations of my religious beliefs. The reasons I thought had for believing in a God were not at all convincing when examined honestly. 

Absent a defensible foundation for God belief, I considered the only honest conclusion would that God is not likely to exist. Looking across the history of human religions, the progression from polytheism to monarchy-polytheism to monotheism is all too clear. I'm quick to dismiss all those silly ancient beliefs like Roman and Greek pantheons. What objective evidence could I point to when asserting that Christianity is somehow different?

The magical beliefs surrounding Christianity fell as well. It's clear from our understanding of the brain that my consciousness resides there in. And that its demise will surely mean the end of my consciousness. There's no rational reason to believe that I will somehow survive the death of my brain. In short, it's wishful thinking that directly conflicts with everything we learned about consciousness.

This last realization took some time to come to grips with. I was raised to believe that my religion made me immortal. That loved ones lived on in a magical place where there was no pain or suffering. Where they were aware of the happenings here on earth. They could possibly even read my mind. I believe that such would be my fate as well, and coming to grips with my mortality was by no means trivial.

I've lived my last 20 years without any sort of God belief and couldn't be happier. My version of immortality is the influence I have on those around me. It's rewarding to realize that I can be inspirational to those around me and that they will carry forward my vision, my joy, and my curiosity to others.

 #NormalizeAtheism

How my Cub Scout Outed me as an Atheist to my Parents

My parents knew I doubted religion long before I left their home.  I was confirmed as a Presbyterian, but my "statement of faith" was weak.  I wonder if my mom still has it.  I attended church from time to time when I was away at college -- mostly to appease my mom.  Christmas, Easter, and the occasional special event.

My wife and I were married in my parents' church, but we'd likely make a different choice if we made it again. We chose the church for all the wrong reasons: tradition, family expectations, comfort.

For almost a decade after that, I was something of an apatheist. Of course I didn't believe there was a god, but I didn't really care much either.  But as my kids entered grade school and started to be able to ask coherent questions about religion, I realized they needed to be prepared for the sorts of indoctrination they would no-doubt get from their religious classmates here in the Bible Belt of Ohio.

I started taking an academic interest in atheism. I started watching debates, reading books, and listening to podcasts like The Thinking Atheist and Dogma Debate. For the first time, I discovered atheist authors like Sam Harris, Richard Dawkins, and Christopher Hitchens. I started talking with my kids about what I believe and why. My kids know what I believe and they know that I will love them no matter what they believe.

My kids know that their grandparents (my parents) hold Christian beliefs. And I've told my kids that they're welcome to ask and discuss with grandma and grandpa. So when my Cub Scout son was reading a Bible story in a Boy's Life magazine with my conservative Christian father, he simply said, "Dad doesn't believe in God". No biggie. Very matter-of-fact. He had no idea that I hadn't really discussed my atheism with my parents.

As I've come to hear more apostasy stories, I've learned that I'm pretty fortunate in how well my parents behaved.  My parents are Presbyterian, one of a handful of American churches that has taken the first steps to supporting same-sex marriage where it is legal. I never once thought that my parents would disown me for my beliefs. My relationship with my parents was somewhat awkward for a couple weeks, but in the en it started a more open dialogue. I took the opportunity to thank them for raising me to know that love is more important then faith. But after listening to a podcast titled Coming out Atheist by Seth Andrews and The Thinking Atheist, I learned that I shouldn't take such things for granted. Shunning is still quite common in fundamentalist religions. Extremist parents actually cut ties with their children who turn away from their religion. It's appalling to me to think that religion could trump family. Of course, that's what Jesus demanded, isn't it?

After the "event", I discussed boundaries with my parents. I said that they're welcome to share their beliefs with my kids, but threats of eternal damnation are off limits. They told me that they don't believe in hell. I was glad to hear that. I've come to believe more recently that people chose the Christian sects that agree with their personality.  The relationship may be reciprocal (with religion also influencing personality), but I suspect with the broad range of Christian Sects, from United Church of Christ to Westboro Baptist, there's a Christianity for everyone.

Overall, I think it's a good thing that my son just laid it all on the table like that. I've been able to share with them the challenges I face as an atheist in conservative Christian community. From my role as Cubmaster in an organization that openly rejects my conclusions about the nature of the universe to my career in a conservative business where most of my coworkers are Christian.